Several people who have met me in a more professional setting will tell you that I am mature and reasonable. While I might somewhat agree with the “reasonable” part, the “mature” is very much a result of my being relatively sensible and wanting to appear professional whenever necessary. I have tricked quite a few people into seeing me as a proper adult and a serious conversation partner. In reality, I think that being addressed by my last name is weird, and watching children’s movies and TV shows, endlessly browsing the internet, drawing pictures of dancing cookies, and having animated discussions with the duck about whether there is such a thing as a business sneaker that you can wear to formal functions, or if we need to invent and popularize it ourselves, are the way to go. Granted, all those are things that many real adults do, too; I’m sure that I’m not the only one who wants to know who wronged the person who then invented business attire as a payback. However, I still cannot relate to those who prefer to talk about their latest investments, fancy restaurants, or a mutual acquaintance’s relationship status rather than funny videos, roller coasters, and ice cream for breakfast. I’m not that kind of adult. Whenever I stay up too late, it’s because I spent too much time on Netflix-
until some nights ago, everything changed: I was trying to figure out a formula in Excel (well, OpenOffice Calc, because I’m cheap like that) – more or less for fun! – and couldn’t stop until I had found a way to get the desired result. Yes, I was wearing my sweatpants in the process. But I also enjoyed working on a spreadsheet more than I did the video game I was currently playing. Maybe that was my first step from having limited success at grownup-pretending into proper adulthood (not only on paper).
When children finally take me seriously, I know I will have succeeded (I think the duck just choked on three cookies from laughing hysterically). That’s when I’ll buy a fancy suit, invest in a few stocks and sign up for a wine tasting!

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